Memorial Day - Body Count 87

While I despise the cattle, I do rather enjoy their holidays. They make it so easy for me to pick them off. The downtown area has been packed with parades and crowds for the last 2 days. I immersed myself amongst them last night, my "human mask" plastered on. I trolled the bars and clubs for several hours past sundown observing the masses. Drunkards and shameless whores from wall to wall in every establishment. Just past midnight I spied a raven haired girl who appeared to be out of place amongst the heathens and blaring din from the speakers. She was sitting quietly alone at the bar drinking water, occasionally checking her phone for either the time or missed calls. It appeared she had been stood up. Around one she she gave up and left some cash on the bar before heading out the door. I pursed her into the still crowded streets, easily remaining hidden from her. She took out her phone and called someone named "Todd", leaving a rather scathing message. Her angered call left her a little disoriented. After hanging up she stopped mid stride and looked around, lost and confused. She turned and looked directly at me. I flashed a quick smile and continued forward. She stopped me, asking if I could direct her towards the Chestnut St. parking garage. I gladly offered her directions and sent her on her way. Fading back into the shadows I continued to pursue her towards the garage. As the crowds thinned out considerably towards Chestnut. I moved in closer. As we neared an alley I quickly covered her mouth with my left hand and forced her back with a knife to her throat. A few feet off the street the blade tore into her flesh, slicing deeply. I threw her to the ground to watch her bleed out. In short order her brown eyes paled and died with the rest of her body. Satisfied with the carnage I left her corpse and headed home for the evening.

Blood Stains On My Hands - Body Count 86

After spending the past few nights with Candace, I stayed at home last night. When I laid down I tossed and turned for several hours. Finally giving up on my losing struggle I grabbed some of my tools and headed out to catch a train. I hadn't intended to start slaughtering cattle this soon but my compulsion got the the better of me. My journey took me to the edge of the Galleria, an area called Green Meadows. It's one of those horribly cheerful names they give to poor neighborhoods that surround affluent areas. Green Meadows isn't bad at all, it just looks terrible by comparison. It's a neighborhood of racial and cultural diversity that doesn't exist in the Galleria. While sitting on the train a young Latino girl caught my attention. She was on her way home from work. Judging by her uniform she worked for one of the airlines, probably at a reservation desk due to her lack of luggage. I noticed a small gold crucifix adorning her neck. It had slipped out from the open button at the top of her dress shirt. I've never understood the cattle and their fascination with religion. It has pacified them into the thoughtless beasts they are today. When our train pulled to a stop I could see the lights from the Galleria. The shined brightly from the towering buildings. The girl and a few other cattle pressed out of the car and I followed. She broke away from the herd and headed towards the commuter lot. I followed her as quietly as possible. My soft soled shoes helped, but with the stillness around us any noise would have spooked her. I noticed a few cameras around the lot but as dark as it was and with my hat I wasn't particularly concerned. The girl found her way to a late model blue Honda. As she unlocked her car and opened the door I quickly swooped in behind her. I restrained her hand from pushing her panic button and grabbed her by the hair, slamming her head violently against the roof. The impact dazed her enough to drop her keys and lose her balance. I pushed her forward into the car and flipped her over to look at her face. Her eyes widened in terror. After going so long without seeing that look it was practically orgasmic. She tried to struggle but I had her pinned down pretty well. With my hand over her mouth I started to work her flesh with my knife. It's amazing how easy it is to shave flesh with a sharp blade. It's almost like slicing cheese. Skin and meat peeled away from her young face and I reached bone and teeth in no time. Blood, tears and saliva covered her face and seat. She was beginning to hyperventilate, her eyes as big as saucers. I started to wonder if she was praying. I wonder if she lost her faith when divine intervention didn't stop me from plunging my knife into her chest. She didn't last long after that. Her breath became shallow and finally ceased as her eyes went dead. It wasn't one of my better efforts but I slept like a rock when I got home.

New Hunting Ground

While leaving Candace's place last night my desire to kill returned with a vengeance. Surrounded by the denizens of the Galleria with their pretentious attitudes and faux personalities I began to plot. The train was packed with potential victims. The bleached blond to my left ignoring her obnoxious offspring while it talked on a phone with reckless abandon. How nice it would be to see its intestines ripped out, bodily fluids of every kind spraying about and matting that ridiculous hair. The trendy couple across from me with their electronic gadgets and expensive clothing would be a sight to behold with their throats slit and texting thumbs shoved into their eye sockets. So many cattle just ripe for the picking. A few more days of restraint to make sure the police have lost all interest in me then the bloodbath will ensue. I must prepare my tools and steel my nerves. I need to be prepared and focused.

New Beginnings

It's been a strange last few days. I spent most of the weekend with Candace. She phoned me early on Friday afternoon and asked if we could meet for dinner. I wasn't particularly in the mood to see her but I thought it might be a good way to kill time while I'm waiting for my watchers to fade away. We met at Niko's, a small Greek restaurant in the Galleria. She was already seated at the bar when I arrived and had been for a little while. She wasn't intoxicated but she was well on her way. The usual radiance I've come to associate with her wasn't apparent. She looked worn out, stretched beyond her means. When she saw me a little flair sparkled in her eyes, hinting at the beauty under her current exterior. She stood up and hugged me tightly. We caught up on the events of our lives since we last spoke. Due to the alcohol her language was quite peppered with profanity. It was actually pretty entertaining. She told me that her niece was in stable condition and it looked like she was going to pull through. I greeted the news with my best "joyous" emotions. We continued our conversation through more drinks and an excellent lamb dinner. By the time I paid our check Candace was quite inebriated. I walked her outside and hailed a cab. She turned and looked at me intensely, with a longing in her eyes. She insisted I accompany her home. I politely declined but she was persistent. We arrived at her building a short while later. She has a very posh, upscale corner loft befitting an executive. After pouring me a club soda and some wine for herself we found ourselves kissing and caressing on her sofa. My mind raced as our efforts intensified. That was not how I had envisioned our evening going. I wasn't sure I even wanted to be there, but her sensuous lips and skilled fingers broke my resolve. At one point I pulled away and told her I didn't want to take advantage of her. I don't think the words even registered. Her sexual appetite was voracious. Our foreplay escalated into a torrid event. Bucking and writhing mixed with screaming moans of ecstasy, filling the cavernous loft. After we reached our apex Candace fell into a deep, liquor infused slumber. I laid awake for several hours contemplating and replaying the evenings events. It had been a very long time since I was intimate with anyone. It was also the first time I could remember not having to fantasize about gruesome violations and murdering my partner to be able to finish. It was just a primal release, an unadulterated lust satisfied. When I awoke the next morning I was very disoriented. It took a few groggy seconds before I recalled where I was and how I had come to be there. Candace was already up and awake. I could smell her cooking breakfast. I found something to cover myself and made my way to the kitchen. She greeted me with a smile and a cup of coffee. We spent some time talking about the prior nights events and the repercussions. After breakfast we decided to spend the weekend together. All things considered it was very enjoyable. My urges to slaughter the cattle seemed to subside while I was with her. I'm not sure what to think of that. My hatred of them has defined me as long as I can remember.

Loosening the Noose

Noticed my police escort was a little light on the train this morning. Only spotted one on the platform and one passed through my car during the ride. When I got to the office I learned that the authorities have another suspect, one that has ties to some Middle Eastern terrorist group. I would surmise the local and federal agents are wetting themselves with joy at that prospect. It makes no difference to me as long as they fuck off and leave me alone. I'm just about at the end of my patience with them. If I can maintain a little while longer they will drop off all together and I can resume purging the cattle. I have so much catching up to do. The streets of this wretched city will flow red before I'm done.

Working Man

Been throwing myself into work to cope with my life under the microscope. 12 hour days yield impressive results. The Corporate Muppet is a giddy idiot. Unfortunately, I'm finding work running low. I've caught up my backlog and started helping some of my "colleagues" with theirs. It's still not enough. I sat and stared at a blank wall in my office for over an hour today, practically foaming at the mouth with the desire to kill. I long for that rush that only comes from piercing cattle flesh with a razor sharp knife. There's a beautiful poetry that is spoken by muffled screams and hopeless struggles. The shear brilliance of horror and terror filled eyes cannot be matched by any painting or photograph. It would be easier to capture lightning in a bottle than mimic these gorgeous sights. When my phone rang with an idiot client on the line it shook me from my day dream. I was so disoriented it was like someone had punched me in the face. I struggled momentarily to put my "human mask" back on. I've got to get a grip on myself lest I end up in a tangible cage.

Reaching Out

Beginning to feel like a rat in a laboratory maze. They're on the train, they're at the park, they're on the streets. I even spotted one at a restaurant when I went to lunch earlier. It's fucking maddening. I spoke to Candace this afternoon. I put on my best sympathetic "human mask". She sounded worn out when we talked, like she hadn't slept in days. She told me they had found her niece. She was alive but still in critical condition at St. Lukes. The girls was impaled with a flying chunk of rebar. Candace said it did quite a bit of damage to her internal organs. The doctors have given her 30% chance of pulling through. It was difficult to maintain my composure at the prospect of inching towards my triple digit goal. I offered her my "sympathies" and told her to call me if she needed anything. That phone call was the one bright spot I've had this week.

Systemic Effect

Spotted two more cops on the train this morning. I wish they would just be overt about it. Their efforts to be anonymous are just sad. Their eyes are too full of life to blend in with the downtrodden cattle during the morning commute. I wasn't the only one that spotted them. Mirror Man was on the train when I boarded. He nonchalantly but quickly made his way to another car to avoid them. I don't know what kinds of things he has done to the cattle in his own right but I'm sure the cops have at least one file on him. We're both just going to have to lay low until this blows over. I hope the cattle bask in this reprieve they're receiving.

Wasted Time

What a fucked up weekend. Spent the better part of Friday night stuck in my "human mask" convincing the cattle at the police station that I had nothing to do with the blast. My argument basically boiled down to the fact that I had purchased a quantity of sodium hydroxide to supplement my soap making hobby. I explained that I had intended to order 2 pounds but ended up with 20 pounds due an error on my part when placing the order. I told them I had tried to return the excess chemical but the company refused. They seemed to accept my response but I could tell there was some lingering doubt. When they finally released me I headed straight home and drifted into a deep, dreamless sleep. When I woke yesterday morning I took a walk to the park. Right away I knew something was wrong. I could feel eyes upon me, the eyes of police. When I got to my bench at the park I looked around at some of the cattle. Most were doing their usual mundane routines. A few, however, stuck out to me. There was one sitting at a bench to my left near the fountain reading a paper. It was trying too hard to look like it wasn't watching me. I spied it peeking at me with my peripheral vision. I saw another with its "child" in a covered stroller. It was paying entirely too much attention to me to be adequately attending the "child". With these wretched things keeping me under surveillance thing are going to prove difficult at best. I haven't even bothered to leave today.

Johnny Law

Looked at the available positions within the company. Nothing is open that would get me away from here discretely. With the fucked economy I can't just walk. This is putting me in a precarious position, especially with the phone call that was on my voice mail last night. A Detective Black would like to speak with me. It appears that the trail of sodium hydroxide was a little easier for them to track than I anticipated. No matter, I have other cover I can use to distract these cattle from me. I just hate have having to deal with the police. Their arrogance and their attitude is sickening. They have this insane rationale that their shiny trinkets and pop guns make them more important than the rest of the cattle. I think I will enjoy watching them burn more than all the rest. I'm supposed to go to the precinct in the Loop to meet the good detective this evening. What a lovely way to start the weekend.

Visions and Dreams

The city has soured to me, much quicker than it should have. Something is in the air here, something not right. I believe it's time to move on. I think the dream from last night is the driving factor. I dreamed I was at the park on my bench surrounded by corpses from the blast. Some were missing limbs, some were scored from head to toe. A few were just piles of flesh and ash. Through the gore I saw Mirror Man rising from the river and coming towards me. He sat on the bench and looked at all the bodies engulfing us. He smiled big and looked at me. He said "I'm proud of you, boy. You've done very well but they are coming for you." I asked him who was coming to which he replied "You know." With that he stood up and walked away from me, crossing the open grounds of the park towards the exit. I woke up shortly afterward. I spent the rest of the night staring at the clock, occasionally getting up to watch the news for more developments.

Back to the Grind

Reluctantly ventured back to the office today. Much as I was loathe to do it, the train ride was worth it. The cattle are still in a state of shock. The fear was painted on their faces. It was one of the quietest rides I've ever had. Conversations were sparse at best and they all seemed to revolve around the blast. There were some conspiracy theories thrown around, some claims of terrorism. A few that tried to reason that it was an accident. I suppose it would be easier for them to regard it as an accident rather than accept reality. The mood was very similar in the office. Even the Corporate Muppet was unusually stoic. Being surrounded by so much quiet fear is very calming, almost therapeutic. Dare I say it, I actually enjoyed being there.

Rising Toll - Body Count 85

I'm elated and apprehensive this morning. Between the recovered bodies and the cattle that died from injuries the death toll is at 77. I had hoped to hit at least triple digits but the blast didn't have quite the impact I expected. There's something to be said about the quality of construction of the Murphy Center. In reading an article earlier I learned that the F.B.I. have discovered the identity of the HVAC technician in the van. Apparently its name was Jorge "George" Ruiz. They are investigating its past and any connection it may have to foreign or domestic terrorist groups. The item that caused me alarm is the fact that they have uncovered trace elements of sodium hydroxide. I have gone to great lengths to cover my trail in buying the chemical but that doesn't preclude them from uncovering something and heading my way. Outsmarting them is easy enough but they can be persistent beasts. Disposing of lawmen cleanly has proven to be a daunting task in the past.

Aftermath

According to the news they are still pulling bodies out of the debris from the explosion. 7 more cattle succumbed to their injuries. It has been a glorious morning all in all despite yesterdays setback. Candace had to cancel our lunch date. Apparently her sister and niece were attending the "concert" and they are still missing. She was calling all of the area hospitals trying to get a bead on them. For the first time since I've known her I had to consciously slip on my "human mask". Over the years I've found that empathy is by far the hardest cattle emotion to mimic. It takes a lot of skill and forethought to convincingly share sorrow. I offered to help her in anyway that I could but she declined. She appreciated the offer and thanked me for my concern, insisting that her family was doing everything they could at the moment. Again I expressed my "condolences" and told her to call me if she needed anything. When I hung up the phone it occurred to me that I never thought of the direct consequences to Candace. I reflected on it for a moment and came to the conclusion that eventually she will see that all of this is for the greater good.

Fall of the Idol - Body Count Unknown

All last night and this morning the news has been atwitter with the explosion. Here's an excerpt from the latest report:

"Last night shortly before 5:00 pm The James Murphy Center was rocked by a massive explosion that left at least 50 people dead and hundreds more injured. The Murphy Center was playing host to an American Idol concert last evening and there were thousands of spectators on hand to witness the event. Investigators have sought the assistance of F.B.I. forensics teams to help determine the cause of the explosion. Preliminary investigations and witness accounts have placed the center of the explosion in the parking garage. The magnitude of the blast was strong enough to level the parking garage and destroy about a quarter of the Murphy Center. Debris from the explosion also caused damages and casualties to surrounding businesses and bystanders. Right now crews are working around the clock sifting through rubble in search of survivors. When we know more...."

Despite all the excitement and anticipation I slept better last night than I have in months, maybe years. I woke up with a feeling of "accomplishment" I guess you could say. Maybe this is the beginning of orchestrating the fall of man.

Load Out - Body Count 8

By the time the HVAC tech got to the storefront I had been there for hours. It was sweltering and miserable inside. The sweat dripped off of my body in buckets. The air was stifling with its stagnation and thickness. I'm glad I requested the first appointment of the day. I just didn't realize that meant the crack of 11:15. The tech lumbered about in the "professional" manner I had expected. I tried to put on a "human mask" and play along with it for a few minutes, but in the end it gave me a headache. A quick slash of the jugular and I felt better than I have in days. I threw it's corpse into the van and started to load the gear. It was a bit of a pain in the ass to carry everything on the train, but I couldn't risk taking the van home. I put the container of sodium hydroxide in the back and and suspended the plastic bag of water and aluminum above it with some rope. I went for a leisurely lunch to kill some time before it was time to deliver the van. There was a small Mexican cantina just up a bit from the storefront. The fajitas were excellent. I'll have to remember to go back there. I headed towards the Murphy Center around 2:30. Traffic was a little heavier than I anticipated but still managed to get there a little after 3:00. The service truck allowed me to pull into the connected garage unhindered. There was a prine spot right next to one of the entrances. I set up a few candles under the rope. The candle will burn through the rope and the flame will travel to the bag and burn a hole in the plastic. The solution will drop into the sodium hydroxide and the fun begins. I waited in the van until about 4:00 and then lit the candles. The cattle had started to flow in at that point for the 5:00 door opening. It was easy to slip out anonymously and find the nearest train station. Now I just have to sit back and wait.

Transportation

After pondering what type of vehicle to procure I had a flash of brilliance - a service truck. They are relatively abundant and inconspicuous. An HVAC van seems to be the best choice with the cattle preparing their homes for summer. I did some reading on car theft skills but I don't want to take the chance on something going wrong this close to the event. It will be easier to simply kill the driver and take its keys. Using a prepaid phone and posing as the owner, I set an appointment for tomorrow morning to have the A/C unit inspected at a vacant storefront a few miles from here. I looked at the building earlier. The locks in the back are easily managed and it's in a low traffic area so cover shouldn't be a problem.

Feeling alright

Finally fell into a deep, dreamless sleep last night. The physical and mental exhaustion took it's toll. I woke up feeling refreshed and invigorated. Told the Corporate Muppet I was working from home for the rest of the week. I answered some emails and caught up on my workload in a few short hours. Made plans to have lunch with Candace on Sunday. Told her I was sick and didn't want to pass it on to her. She fawned over me for a moment before she had to return to work. I'm curious as to how she'll react to Saturdays event. A little later I'm going to read up on auto theft skills and find a suitable vehicle for the task at hand. I'm really leaning towards a van of some sort. Also need to run out later and buy a few provisions for this to work.

Sickened Days

Spent the last day and a half in bed. Between the lack of sleep and the colossal fuck up the other night I just feel spent. My head just spins whenever I stand up. I haven't been to the office or even returned Candace's phone calls. The news has been abuzz with reports of the stabbing and whether or not they are related to other deaths that have occurred in the Loop over the last few months. The only consoling factor in the whole thing is that none of the cattle got a good look at me. The police have literally issued a BOLO for the idealized serial killer - white male between 25 and 40, medium build, blond to light brown hair, between 5'10" and 6'2". I must repent for this transgression. The American Idol plan must go perfectly.

Raining Blood - Body Count 7

Insomnia plagued me again last night. I decided to take the train to the Loop and walk around. That was a huge mistake. The smell of the cattle was nauseating from the moment I stepped onto the platform. They were everywhere. Running around playing slap and tickle with each other in a loud, drunken haze. It's amazing that this group represents the pinnacle of higher education. A half hour into my stroll it started to rain. The feeling of the precipitation against my skin made my flesh crawl. I took refuge in what I thought would be a quiet cafe. In my haste to get out of the weather I neglected to notice the poetry slam advertisement in the window. Young pretentious, moronic cattle as far as the eye could see. I zeroed in on the one on stage. It was unshaven and generally unkempt as is the norm of this area. It spoke of heartache and loss in a nasally, whiny monotone voice. Occasionally the voice broke into primal screaming to convey the depths of anguish and despair it spoke of. Looking around at the mesmerized crowd it became clearly evident to me that the "poet" must die. It needed to feel real pain. I was able to bear through the other rabble and get a bead on the "poet". It was surrounded by a collection of groupies. Getting to it would prove to be difficult. Around midnight the crowd started to die down as the cafe was closing. The "poet" hung around seeing off its friends and talked to the manager about the evenings events. I made my way outside to lay in wait. The rain had turned into a torrential down pour. I almost missed the "poet" leaving. I quickly caught up to it with the intention of pulling it into an alley to quietly bleed it. Unfortunately when I reached for it my hands slipped of its wet clothing. It turned around and yelled out of surprise. Reacting on instinct I shoved my blade into it's throat. Over the din of the rain I was able to hear a few distant cries from the scarce foot traffic still about. I turned and ran down an alley which luckily wasn't a dead end. I circled around the cafe and headed towards the train. I cut through a small neighborhood to dispose of the knife. After wiping it down I threw it into a storm sewer and continued towards the station. Instead of boarding at the Loop I walked two miles to the next station on Laclede. By the time I got there I looked like a drowned rat. I rode home in quiet contemplation. I did an utterly stupid thing. Did any of the cattle see me? Will any of the cattle on the train remember me?

Insomnia

Hardly got any sleep last night. Every time I closed my eyes I kept seeing Mirror Man. After a few restless hours I got up and walked to the train station. I decided I wasn't in the mood to go for a ride when I got there. Ended up walking aimlessly for hours, occasionally stopping to peer in windows to observe the cattle in their natural habitats. Most were enjoying blissful, envious sleep but I did come across a few things of note. I saw three couples fornicating, five individuals watching informercials and a rather sad, strange one sitting on it's bed covered in peanut butter masturbating to beastiality porn. Such strange diverse creatures these cattle can be. After a while I found my thoughts turning to Candace, wondering where she was and if she was thinking of me. I continued my trek and pondering until the first rays of daylight breached the horizon. Reluctantly I headed for home to prepare for the day.

Saturday Night Dinner

Candace met me at Giorgio's, a quaint Italian restaurant in the Loop. It has great food, it's very quiet and it's secluded. She was stunning when she walked in. Her hair was pulled up off her shoulders showing off her sparkling earrings. The brightness of her deep blue eyes offset her black hair. It took me a second to stand up and pull out a chair for her. I'm not sure if I was dazzled by her or if my "human skills" are that rusty. It certainly had been a while since I've been out with a woman. She greeted me with her warm smile and we ordered some drinks, a red wine for her and a club soda for myself. She curiously inquired about my non-alcoholic tendencies. I regaled her with a tragic but false story of my best friend "William" dying in a horrible drunk driving escapade. She apologized profusely and asked if I was offended by her drinking. I quickly assured her that I was fine with it and not drinking was just my personal choice. That seemed to put her at ease. We had a lengthy conversation over veal. She revealed a few interesting personal tidbits about herself and I told her some "facts" about me. I got the impression that she is becoming enamored with me. We ended the evening making plans for another date over a cup of cappuccino. We shared a short, but passionate kiss before we parted. Her scent lingered around me for a little while after she left. Candace is special.